Category Archives: Recipes for hapiness

Mastery: a decision to continue one’s own evolution

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ochiul florii kanaloaThere are a lot of people carrying around a master’s diploma. And requiring for their mastery to be recognized. There is one saying coming from Don Beckett, ReiKi Master: a Master is just someone who decided to continue walking the Path. 

Well said. But what are the key features of Mastery, be it about spiritual teaching or carpentry work? How does a master look like? How can one recognize a true master and, more complex yet, how can one choose a master?

mastery

It all starts with following and living a set of principles. No matter these are the ten commandments, the five shamanic agreements or the seven Huna Principles, there must be a behavior foundation that creates a framework for all we think, say and do.We typically call this ethics.

The next big one is compassion. In the broad sense, we find it in “love thy neighbor” or Aloha or Be Kind to Others. But one key issue that usual occurs in the path to mastery is that we still do those things for ourselves, and not for others. One of the spiritual traps. If we heal, teach, protect, charge just for a personal benefit – be it money or fame, being in the center of attention or simply get remarked – the whole effort slides down the drain. Mastery is  for others and it has to be exercised with the two following bubbles in the chart:

download (1)One is humbleness. Ego has no room in a master’s behavior. The car, the house, the social status, the expected recognition – if they are still present and manifesting, it is the right time for pulling up our sleeves and starting to work on the Me, Me, Me issue.

Are you reacting emotionally to criticism instead of taking the information in to reflect on it and seeing what tiny or big thing you can improve? More work is needed.

download (2)The next one, really important, is to stay present in this world of now. Not on a mountain top. In our workshops and conferences we met people who displayed a balanced, loving, compassionate behavior in a meditation circle, and oozing frustration, anger and dissatisfaction immediately after the sessions ended. Mastery is displayed equally in the physical world and in manifesting emotions, in the mind, everywhere. A master has a consistent behavior, no matter it is about brushing teeth or offering empowerments.

This balance  is radiating out of the persons who advance on the path to mastery. People want to be around these persons. Attracting the ones desperately in need for affection or the ones wanting mental gymnastics for the satisfaction of the intellect only  is not it. When people genuinely feel good around you, it means you are on the right track. Not because of the way you do things. Your mere presence is radiating this balance, and people usually say they feel at peace, protected and satisfied.

Last feature and most important is excellence.  A master has to be brilliant at what he or she does. Many of our students want to start sharing something immediately after they have learned it – but the key is patient, consistent and diligent practice, to learn the behaviors or techniques, and to get a deeper understanding, valuable insights and a comprehensive vision on the respective topic.

You might want to try and practice each of the bubbles of about three weeks… and see what changes. And if you are looking for a master, here are the three key things to help you make up your mind:

1. There is solid proof of excellence. Clearly, there is a lot to learn from this person.

2. There is chemistry between you and that person.  And the chemistry is both ways. Masters do live in earthly bodies, they might have feelings. Students that drop our of their work with the master just because they did not feel loved enough have some serious topics for reflection… it is easy to point the finger at someone else.

3. The master is available. Availability does not mean he or she will definitely reply all your 10 sms’s right now. And availability will also mean that the master will be there for you when you think you do not direction and support. The master is not a friend, but the most (com)passionate personal coach one could imagine. Between the helping, the encouragement and the spanking, this person will always be interested in your progress without having any interest in his or her own benefits.

Good luck . Practice. Keep walking the Path.

January 1: New Moon. Time for wishes.

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The Moon. Celestial body of the emotions, carrier of our good and less good habits. Embodiment of potential. Since ancient times, the New Moon and Full Moon were times for planting and harvesting, and the shamans’ fires have been lighting up the nights of such phases for millennia.

The year of 2014 starts with a New Moon: time for planting, and that does not refer to cereals only, but to intentions, too: this is the best moment in the last years to set a personal evolution wish and send to the Universe the “order” for its manifestation. You can start this year in a different, profound, significant way, influencing all that is to happen. Here is how you can do it:

After having your midnight champagne, sit down and reflect upon the goal or purpose you most wish for: so deep and so important that every cell in your body yearns for it. The most hidden corner of the mind carries it. Take a pen and a paper  – you can do it as a group game, it will have even more power – and write down carefully what is that you wish for. A few notes about the notes:  :

– it is important to write what we wish, because this gives us clarity.

– write everything as it is happening now. Visualize the movie of your wish coming true, feel the sensations accompanying this fulfillment.

– refer to you and you only. The wish must not infringe the free will of anyone else: if it refers to someone, what you will write is the behavior changes you will experience, so that the desired situation is facilitated: for example, instead of writing “X loves me” you can write “I will become worthy of X’s love”.

– Check with your heart if what you have just written is correct. How do we do this? It is simple. Feel the joy and well-being emanating from what you wrote. That is the indication the text is “right”.

– Watch your words. What you write comes true exactly as it is written.

Ready? All written?  Your contract with the Universe has just been stamped, scanned and emailed for fulfillment. And it should be treated like any other contract: .once written, you do not revisit it all the time, but wait for it to happen, believing it will happen. At the right time. Take your paper, wrap it nicely, put it in a box on your altar or  next to your bed and wait without thinking about what it contains. Being detached from the object of our wish is an essential criterion for its manifestation.  

You may close your ceremony by planting something – a bean, a seed, a clove of garlic – but be careful with the caring and nurturing of this growing plant – or lighting up a fire to burn all that is old and make room for the new energies that you have just invoked in your note.

And so it is.

Turn around your love life.

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ImageThis week’s conversations in the healing sessions were mostly about love, so here is the subject for today. Confronting people with their own paradox of feelings, on gets to reflect more on the topic. Love may be blissful, but it usually is painful, generating fears and frustrations in addition to the sheer, deep pain.

And because answers always come when you ask the right question, immediately after meditating on love’s suffering, an Osho quote landed on my desktop. It explains how the trigger makes a certain aspect become obvious in the mirror of your beloved.  Read the quote. Note the behavior. Watch the reaction. It is apparently simple but it requires effort to re-train the mind. Once accomplished, the new pattern of constructive thinking starts generating positive responses. Do it, watch it be patient: the more you are used to the negative states of thought, the longer it will take to dissolve those patterns and get into the creative, love-generating mind.

ImageRelationship is a mirror, and the purer the love is, the higher the love is, the better the mirror, the cleaner the mirror. But the higher love needs that you should be open. The higher love needs you to be vulnerable. You have to drop your armor; that is painful. You have not to be constantly on guard. You have to drop the calculating mind. You have to risk. You have to live dangerously. 

The other can hurt you; that is the fear in being vulnerable. The other can reject you; that is the fear in being in love. The reflection that you will find in the other of your own self may be ugly; that is the anxiety. Avoid the mirror. But by avoiding the mirror you are not going to become beautiful. By avoiding the situation you are not going to grow either. 

The challenge has to be taken. One has to go into love. That is the first step towards Divine, and it cannot be bypassed. Those who try to bypass the step of love will never reach Divine. That is absolutely necessary because you become aware of your totality only when you are provoked by the presence of the other, when your presence is enhanced by the presence of the other, when you are brought out of your narcissistic, closed world under the open sky.

Osho

If you like this alternative and you are ready to try it, just remember that it takes 21 days to teach the mind something…. keep this focus for three weeks in a row, with ZERO expectations. Comment on this article when you find that the strategy works. It will help many others, and build more energy in your turnaround endeavor.

Namaste.

What would Love do now?

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Love would radiate.

Early morning. I am flowing on the street, in my little yellow Smart car, to the meetings of today. The line is moving slowly, at the speed of the slowest driver. Useless car corn sounds, people are in a rush, people are angry, people are. I refuse to get frustrated, because the chillout music is dripping from the speakers and last night’s continuous coughing drained me.

Then I wonder. What would Love do now? and the left hand raises above the steering wheel,  golden light springs from it, like small precious minuscule scales floating in the sunlight and diffusing into everything on the road.

It is noon. A sun so hot it makes you confused. On the street that gets me home, right across from the subway station, traffic is blocked. Orange police plastic pawns trace a boundary on the asphalt. A police car set like a barrier. Chalk marks on the grey road. The black and yellow plastic measuring tape. I freeze. A few white pearls quietly lay on the road. Next to a car wheel, a bottle of water fallen from a woman’s hand.

The, I get myself together and ask: is there something I can do at this moment, in this present reality? and the hot July afternoon, teaming with butterfiles, I send the good thought, golden and loving, straight from my heart, to that young woman who is already in the ER of a hospital. She will live. There will be a lot of hard recovery work after she ran across a busy street.

I get home.

In my bedroom, the spoiled lemon tree I got as a gift for my birthday gives me a present: a first ripe fruit that fell off a branch. Apparently, this lemon fruit stayed the same since I got the tree.

Actually it grew a lot since March. I am happy I did not pick it earlier, because this wonderful plant gave it to me when the time was right. When it got really ripe.

So I spent some time contemplating the wonder of the existence of this fruit. My relationship with this frail but strong little tree and the contrast between the tiny branch and the heavy, sensuous lemon. I sent a thank you thought to the tree and mentally hugged the authors of the present. My giant lemon, demonstrating that all you need to do is love. Unconditionally. I ask myself again: what would Love do now? I think it would share the lemon with as many friends as possible. It will get into the cups of tea that all my visitors get when they enter the door.

What I am trying to say is that Mastery is a path that flows, unseen, parallel with each second of Today.  Today only, now only, try for a second to do what a Master would do, not what a human would do. Try what Love would do. That turns life into a continous miracle.

Relationship Karma

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Enough is enough. All people I meet tell me the same thing. They are captive in a pattern. It might be the “wrong partner” pattern, or the loneliness pattern, or the one-way love pattern. .

No matter what the pattern is, there is a reason.

It is based on the theory of reincarnation, so if you do not believe in it, just click  on the right side of this tab and close the blog now.

But if you do think that the soul can transmigrate from a realm to another one, from a body to another body,  over space and time, then you might find a satisfactory explanation for the unsatisfactory aspects of your private life .

The first point we need to take into account is that we all are exploring a relationship facet in each lifetime. Most often, the people you interact with were your parents, children, masters, protectors in previous lives. The woman you fell for might have been your son last time. 😀

This changes  profoundly the way we see this relationship, doesn’t it?

We came with a love capital we had forgotten, entered this life marching with our military boots over the hearts of the ones  we kept meeting, then we end up wondering why we are not loved. Most often, the relationship we enter is a perfect mirror of what we offered in previous encounters.

Did we abandon them last time? We might expect to be abandoned. Did we betray them? Expect betrayal.

Another important point is that these episodes tend to occur in cycles. Men choosing the same type of woman, just another face, in successive relationships. Women, captive in a repetitive male model – usually not the ideal one. Here we need to understand that each of these people coming to our lives is a lesson, an opportunity to improve ourselves. If we do not get the lesson and we do not act upon it, we receive it once again. And again. And again.  Until we pass the exam.

How can one understand a lesson? It is simple. Look, objectively, at what happened. Objectively is not “it’s the other’s fault” or “I did nothing wrong”. To be objective is to look at the nature of the issue,. What part of your behavior facilitates the manifestation of the issue. Then, roll up your sleeves and start working on that behavior. Take the file, nicely smooth all bumps and fill all holes with love – to make it short, you grow. I can offer many examples of people working with me to go through this process. Typically, one year later they come and say “my life has changed”. So there is room for hope 😀

Conventionally speaking, we must be lucid when falling in love or entering a social relationship with someone. Before letting your self dive into it, just ask yourself: is this someone who appreciates me? Who makes me feel special, different, wonderful? Who makes me feel at ease? Is it a person I can learn from? If the answer is yes, take a seat in the desk and get your lessons. If not, stop complaining about repeating patterns.

Remember: these people are our mirrors… that is why the most important lesson is:

Remember to emit, 24/7, those feelings, sensations and thoughts we want to feel from  the ones around us.

The high “frequency” of emotions and mind will sift automatically your professional, social and intimate partners that are not suitable to our own harmony. This is the most important lesson. We are what we think.

The cure for being stuck is experimenting.

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Here is a quote and ten rules that should get you out :

The definition of madness is continuing to do the same, expecting something to change.

1. Open your eyes. Wide. Focus your attention on what works. Stay there and if the mind comes back to nag you about what does not work, send it to its place.

2. Try every day something new. The mind locked in its old energy, like a ghost in a century old house, will re-learn to create.

3.  Look around you and ignore what is wrong. The more you concentrate on what hinders you, the more power you give to the obstacle.

4. Create something on purpose. Paint. Draw. Write. Sing. Buy clay and mold something. Paint your old tea cup with permanent markers and apply lacquer on top to keep the image from erasing.

5. Get in touch with the earth and whatever is green. Plant a carrot, or an onion in a pot, and watch them bloom. Plant sprout seeds, harvest and add those to your salad.

Place an avocado seed in a pot and wait for the tree to spring from it.

6. Take days off when all the others work. Work when the others are taking their vacation.

7. Play when you work. Don’t take yourself too seriously. If you don’t like what you are doing, look for another job.

8. Wear colored clothes, every day a different color.

9. Move furniture around the house, clean and throw another housewarming party.

10. Daydream (this one is mandatory), at least 10 minutes a day.

Apply consistently all the above, or invent your own way of re-experience life, without any fear of making mistakes. Whoever makes no mistakes learns nothing.

We are the sum of all changes, minor and major, that we consciously make within us, day by day. A person that stopped learning and seems to know everything should better pay the installments for the casket, because life is over.

The secret to success is elasticity. Whoever is elastic can tie laces without back pains and can adapt on the spot to any rising opportunity… And opportunities become visible only if you apply rule #1: be here, now, with your eyes wide open, so that you can creat your life in the best way possible, second by second.